Power Trips & Control Issues

Chapter 9: Power Trips & Control Issues

The Fight for Influence Across Generations


Introduction

Every generation is wired to seek power.
It just shows up in different forms.

  • Older generations often see power as responsibility and legacy.
  • Younger generations define it as freedom and influence.

The tension?

They’re both right—but they’re not listening to each other.


The Power Struggle in Real Time

One of the hardest dynamics to navigate is when your family, parents, or close friends are also your employer or spiritual authority.

The lines blur fast.

What starts as “helping out” can quickly feel like a trap if boundaries and communication aren’t clear.

  • Older generations often say: “Respect my authority.”
  • Younger generations are thinking: “Why are you trying to control me?”

Neither side is trying to hurt the other—
but when roles aren’t defined, and honor is confused with obedience,

it becomes a power struggle disguised as loyalty.


Story: The Invisible Contract

A young adult named Marcus worked for his parents’ ministry.

He loved them, honored their leadership, and was excited to help—at first.

But what started as service turned into unspoken expectations.

His father, a respected elder and spiritual leader, often said:

“I know what’s best. Just do what I say.”

To him, it was leadership.
To Marcus, it felt like invisible manipulation.

Marcus wasn’t rebellious—he just wanted to be respected as an adult.

He tried to speak up but was told he was:

  • Being emotional
  • Entitled
  • Too “modern”

Eventually, Marcus stopped trying to lead altogether.
Not because he didn’t care,
but because he was never really given authority—just responsibility.

It broke the relationship—
not because of disagreement,
but because there was no room for discussion.


Don’t Sign Up If You’re Not In Charge

Don’t Sign Up If You’re Not In Charge

Here’s the hard truth:

If you’re not truly in charge, don’t agree to take the weight of something that’s still under someone else’s control.

That’s not rebellion. That’s wisdom.

Too many younger leaders are asked to:

  • “Own the vision”
  • But can’t shift anything without getting permission

Too many parents want their adult children to:

  • “Take over”
  • But won’t let go of the steering wheel

Too many families fall apart because no one says the honest thing:

“I love you, but we need clear roles, real boundaries, and mutual respect—or we will destroy each other emotionally in the name of ministry.”


Biblical Insight: Shared Power, Shared Purpose

In Genesis 1:26, God said:

“Let us make mankind in our image… so that they may rule.”

Notice—it wasn’t a solo effort.
Even God—Father, Son, and Spirit—operated in shared dominion.

Real leadership isn’t about control—it’s about collaboration.

Jesus, even as the Son of God, told His disciples in John 15:15:

“I no longer call you servants… Instead, I have called you friends.”

Why?

Because authentic influence invites people into the process, not just the position.


The Root of Control

Control isn’t always about pride.
Sometimes, it’s fear:

  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of disrespect
  • Fear of irrelevance
  • Fear of being replaced

And when that fear isn’t healed, it turns into:

  • Micromanagement
  • Manipulation
  • Spiritual guilt

Especially in multigenerational environments.


Reflection Questions

  1. Where am I holding power that I need to share or release?
  2. Have I ever taken on responsibility without the authority to make decisions?
  3. How can I build a culture at home, in church, or in business where every generation feels heard and respected?

Call to Action

Let’s break the cycle.

Let’s:

  • Stop demanding blind loyalty
  • Start building bold trust
  • Stop confusing silence with honor
  • Start having real conversations

Because power isn’t about control.

It’s about stewardship.

And when generations learn to share it,

something unstoppable gets released.

Jamil King Ministries
Jamil King Ministries

Jamil King is the founder of Jamil King Ministries, a platform dedicated to empowering individuals to live faith-filled lives rooted in biblical truth. With a passion for Bible study and interpretation, Jamil inspires others to grow spiritually, strengthen their families, and embrace leadership with a servant's heart. Through his writings on Christian living, prayer, and emotional wellness, Jamil offers practical insights and heartfelt encouragement to those seeking a deeper connection with God. His ministry also shares inspirational stories and guidance on navigating relationships with love and purpose.
Contact Information:
Jamil King Ministries
8745 Gary Burns Dr. Suite 160 #352
Frisco TX 75034

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