Chapter 7: Don’t Just Preach — Be Real

Why Authenticity Is the New Loyalty

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Introduction

In today’s culture, the pulpit isn’t the only platform—and authority alone doesn’t guarantee influence.

We are living in a time when younger generations—especially Millennials and Gen Z—are not impressed by titles, stages, or who “lays hands” on who.

They’re asking one question louder than ever:

“Are you real?”

Not polished. Not powerful. Not perfect.
Real.

Because if you:

• Preach deliverance but live in denial, they’ll see it.
• Shout about faith but hide your fears, they’ll feel it.
• Demand loyalty but won’t give honesty, they’ll walk away.

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Small Story: The Realest Moment in the Room

A young adult group invited a guest pastor to speak—someone well-known, eloquent, and experienced. The room was packed, but the energy was cautious. Everyone expected the usual: three points, a Bible verse, and a high note to close.

But instead, the pastor opened with this:

“Before I share anything, I want to tell you that two years ago, I almost quit ministry. I was depressed, angry, and felt like God had gone silent. I kept preaching, but I was dying inside. And I didn’t tell anyone until it almost cost me everything.”

The room shifted.

Phones went down.
Walls came down.
Hearts opened up.

That night, he didn’t win them over with Greek words or clever quotes. He won them with honesty.

Because sometimes the most powerful word is:

“Me too.”

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The Generational Shift

Older generations were taught:

• “Be strong.”
• “Be silent.”
• “Be steady.”

Younger generations were raised in a world that rewards transparency:

• “Be honest.”
• “Be seen.”
• “Be human.”

This doesn’t mean one generation is better than the other.
It means the definition of loyalty has changed.

• Then: “Follow no matter what.”
• Now: “Can I trust you to be real?”

People don’t leave churches and leaders because of flaws.
They leave when those flaws are:

• Hidden
• Denied
• Used to manipulate

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Biblical Insight: Wounds That Heal

In John 20:27, the resurrected Jesus appears to Thomas and says:

“Put your finger here; see My hands. Reach out your hand and put it into My side.”

He didn’t hide His scars.
He used them to build trust.

Even after resurrection, Jesus understood:

Realness builds relationship.

He didn’t say, “Believe because I said so.”
He said, “Come close. See for yourself.”

That’s the model.
That’s what this generation is looking for.

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Why Realness Is the New Influence

In leadership, realness is more powerful than rhetoric.

Because:

• Reels can’t fix what realness builds
• Followers want connection, not just content
• Anointing flows best through transparency

People want to know:

• Have you been through anything?
• Did God meet you in the mess?
• Can your story speak to mine?

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Reflection Questions

1. Where have I chosen presentation over transparency?
2. What part of my story have I been afraid to share out of fear it would make me look weak?
3. Who needs to hear the real, unedited version of my testimony?

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Call to Action

Don’t just preach.
Be real.

Because your story, your scars, your surrender—that’s what builds bridges.

Not hype. Not image. Not perfection.
Truth.

When you lead from a place of truth,
you won’t just gain followers—

you’ll birth transformation.